We have all read a thousand positive quotes telling us to be kind to one another. But, it can be difficult to know when you cross the line from being a nice person to being someone that others feel that they can walk all over. There are many situations that ask for attitudes and responses that are not first and foremost "kind".
If you're are trying to figure out how to love yourself, one of the first things that you might need to learn to do is understand when it is okay to say "no" and when it is right to speak up. Complacency can have serious negative effects and the best people are those who are willing to be an advocate when one is needed.
Being kind and compassionate and being outspoken and strong are not opposites of each other. If everyone lead with kindness, there would certainly be less inequality and marginalization in the world. But, until we all get there, make sure you're the person who is willing to step up when you see discrimination or abusive situations. Don't let yourself or others put up with others' bullsh*t!